Brighton on Edge

Grey close skies - glimpses of summer. Another internet cafe opposite the big Tesco's near George Street. Cramped seats and everything feeling odd. I caught the bus into town (the 'usual' internet cafe I use had a broken internet) and the town centre felt amphetamine fueled, everyone moving too fast and too aggressively. Packs of marauding foreign students, gleeful as a pack of dogs, sweeping from everywhere. A hippy driving a van beeps his horn aggressively at a Spanish man who wasn't even really in his way. Be glad to get to Worcester for a few days. be glad when it gets to autumn.
The trouble with having a week off work is the amount of time spent watching the time, counting the hours until it is time to go back, scared to do anything in case it is the wrong thing to do. Fear of holiday-commitment. Spend hours not really doing anything till you leave the house and try to find an internet cafe that is either comfortable or working. Onl;y time I do seem to feel at peace is over those long, meandering evening walks... except of course these twilit walks are lately threaded through with an air of underlying disquiet.